How Can I Know if My Anxiety in Therapy Is Due to Past Memories or the Therapist?

It is important to remember that trauma survivors and dissociative systems may sometimes feel fear, danger, or distrust even with safe therapists because therapy can activate implicit memories and old survival responses. However, this does not mean you should automatically dismiss your reactions. Trauma survivors are often conditioned to override their own discomfort, uncertainty, or discernment in order to maintain relationships or avoid conflict. Instead of immediately assuming either “this therapist is dangerous” or “this is only my trauma,” it may be more helpful to become curious about the pattern over time.

Consider the following questions:

• Does the therapist respond respectfully to concerns? – If the therapist does not respectfully consider and seek to understand and address your concerns, this may suggest your concerns deserve serious attention.. If the therapist becomes defensive or blames you, you have the right to ask for referrals and terminate your working relationship with them.
• Do you feel more understood and grounded after difficult conversations, or more confused, ashamed, pressured, or unsafe?
• Are any parts of your system voicing concerns or sharing that they have to step in to handle parts of the session for you? – If other parts of your system are handling parts of the sessions, you may need to ask them why they are and what they are experiencing. You may be unaware of everything occurring during sessions.

Your reactions deserve attention, even when their meaning is not immediately clear.

This page is part of the Therapy and Finding Safe, Supportive Healing section of the CommuniDID site, which explains how to evaluate therapists, recognize trauma-informed care, and understand what safe, phase-based DID treatment should look like.

Explore more:

• Questions about therapy and DID
• My Therapist Seems Great. Why Am I Feeling Like Something Bad Could Happen Suddenly?
• What Are Red Flags in DID or OSDD Therapy?
• What Are Signs of a Good Therapist for DID or OSDD?

Have a question this page didn’t answer? Click “Yes” or “No” below and a comment box will appear where you can leave your question. Comments are reviewed but not made public.