Explaining Dissociative Identity Disorder To Children
(Summary) Talking to kids about DID or OSDD can feel overwhelming — but it doesn’t have to be. In this video, I share practical ways to explain your system in language children can understand, from everyday examples of “parts” and “roles” to age-appropriate metaphors that make sense. You’ll also hear about two children’s books written to help families talk about DID, plus tips for setting healthy boundaries around privacy so your child knows what’s okay to share outside the family.
Last week, I talked about why you might want to tell your kids about your DID or OSDD. This week, I’m going to talk about how you might tell them if you decide you want them to know.
It’s important that you tell them in a developmentally appropriate way. It might be enough for younger kids to talk about the parts that everyone has. For example, a child might have had the experience having a part of themselves wanting to go to the park while at the same time a part of themselves also wanted to watch TV or go to a grandparent’s house. When a child understands this, that everyone has parts, you can explain that your parts are a little more pronounced than most people’s.
Another way to explain the concept of having a system of parts to kids is to talk about roles. A child has the role of your child, may have the role of being the big sister or the little brother, they may have the role of student, and they may play on a sports team or do dance or gymnastics or scouting or some such. The child is the same child in each of these roles, but they are also focused slightly differently in each of those roles. For instance, while they might climb into your lap for a hug in their role as your child, they probably wouldn’t do that with the coach of their team or activity. A student is focused on learning, a child in an activity like soccer or dance is focused on learning to do their sport well, and so on. Kids can understand that you have parts that focus on different tasks and needs, too. Only your parts may be more noticeable than some other people’s parts.
If you want some help having this discussion, here are two books that are appropriate for young children on up. And you can even use them to educate adults in your life who have only what they’ve seen on TV and the movies for their understanding of DID.
The two books are My Mommy has Multiple Parts: A childrens book about having a parent with Dissociative Identity Disorder by Joh Knyn,
and
The Patchwork Quilt: A book for children about Dissociative Identity Disorder by J.D. Clark
You may want to have a talk with your kids about the idea of privacy about your diagnosis if you are concerned they might tell classmates, teachers, or others. They can understand that some things are okay for family to know but not other people. You probably have examples of things like that. For instance, if your six year old is still wetting the bed at night, that’s something the family knows that classmates don’t need to know.
If this was helpful, I’d appreciate it if you would like the video so it’s more likely others will see it and get this information. Thank you!
Frequently Asked Questions
Should I tell my kids about my DID or OSDD?
It depends. Some parents choose to share in age-appropriate ways to reduce confusion and build trust. Others may wait until their kids are older. What matters most is your children’s developmental stage and your comfort with sharing. See this video for more information: https://www.communidid.com/telling-the-kids/
How do I explain DID to young children?
You can start with concepts they already understand, like having different “parts” of themselves—wanting to play and watch TV at the same time—or the different roles they play (student, sibling, teammate). This helps kids grasp that having parts is normal, and yours are just more noticeable.
Are there children’s books about DID?
Yes. My Mommy Has Multiple Parts by Joh Knyn and The Patchwork Quilt by J.D. Clark are written for kids and can help explain DID in gentle, relatable ways. They can also be useful for adults who only know DID from movies or TV.
How can I talk to my kids about keeping my diagnosis private?
You can explain that some information is for family only, just like other personal things kids wouldn’t share with classmates. For example, a child may understand that bedwetting is something private. In the same way, your diagnosis can be private too.
What if my kids have questions I can’t answer?
It’s okay to say you don’t know or that you’re still learning. You can also use books, resources, or therapy to help guide the conversation. The key is keeping the discussion open, safe, and at a level your child can understand.