In a healthy relationship, reciprocity means both people give, receive, care, and make room for each other over time. This doesn’t have to be at the same moment. For instance, if you are very sick, a friend might bring a casserole to your house so you have an easy home-cooked meal. Your friend doesn’t expect you to immediately do something in return. Later, your friend might need you to take her to drop off her car at the mechanic and pick it up later, and you help with this. This is reciprocity.
Healthy reciprocity does not mean everything is always perfectly equal or balanced in every moment. Sometimes one person gives more support because the other person is struggling, sick, overwhelmed, or going through something difficult. Over time, though, both people should matter in the relationship.
Relationships where one person is always giving and another is always taking are not healthy.
This page is part of the DID in Close Relationships section of the CommuniDID site, which explains how switching, memory gaps, and attachment triggers affect relationships and how partners and families can navigate these dynamics.
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