Can a 5 Minute Meeting Change Everything?
(Summary) Creating daily structure with DID doesn’t have to mean rigid routines. One of the simplest, most effective tools is a daily system meeting—a short check-in that builds calm, clarity, and cooperation inside. Whether you hold it in the morning, evening, or another quiet moment, this practice helps your system know what to expect, strengthens communication, and lays the foundation for trust and stability.
So previously, I talked about the benefits of having some sort of structure to your days and weeks, and I talked about the difficulties of maintaining that structure consistently.
What I didn’t talk about was how to actually do it. That’s what I’m starting today.
And I think the key that can make the biggest difference for you is the daily system meeting.
If you’re not already doing this, I recommend starting there.
Just that.
You don’t need to build a full routine overnight—trying to do everything at once can easily become overwhelming. For many systems, starting the day with a short system meeting can create a sense of calm, clarity, and internal cooperation. It’s a way to let your system know what to expect for the day—and to ask for your system’s help in making sure important things happen the way you’d like them to.
That said, not everyone is a morning person. As a night owl myself, I completely understand. I’m not at my best right after waking up—I need a little time before I’m functional.
If that’s you, consider holding your system meeting in the evening before bed instead. It works just as well, and you can use that time to talk about what to expect the following day.
And if neither morning nor evening feels right, then your first step is to find a time in your day that can work consistently.
When I say “time,” I don’t necessarily mean 9 a.m. or 11 p.m.—I mean a moment in your day when things are generally quiet enough for you to turn inward. Look for a pocket of time where your system can start to count on that check-in.
Now, I know some of you might be thinking,
“But what if I can’t communicate with my system?”
No worries—you can still do the meeting. In fact, most people can’t hear back from their system at first. That’s completely normal.
The important thing to know is this: even if you can’t hear them, your system can likely hear you. And showing up day after day for this kind of check-in actually helps build the connections you need for better communication down the line.
Connections in your brain—and trust between you and your parts.
Yes, it might feel like you’re talking into the void. And yes, it might feel awkward or even a little silly at first. I felt that way too when I started making these videos. That feeling will fade.
What matters is that you keep showing up for yourself and your system.
And here’s the really cool thing: just by doing this—even if you miss a few days as you’re building the habit—you’ve already created your first piece of daily structure.
That’s something to be proud of.
And if you’d like a little help building on that—something simple you can come back to—I’ve put together a free guide with prompts, examples, and ideas to support systems like yours as you create daily structure.
You’ll find the link in the description below.
There’s no perfect way to do a system meeting. They are as unique as every system. Give yourself permission to do it in the way that feels right for you.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. What should I include in a daily system meeting?
There’s no script you have to follow. Many systems start by saying hello, reviewing the day’s priorities, and asking if any part has needs or concerns. Even if you don’t hear responses yet, voicing those questions shows openness. Over time, you can experiment with prompts, journals, or the guide mentioned in the post for extra support.
2. What if I feel silly talking to myself?
That feeling is very common at the beginning. Think of it less as “talking to yourself” and more as building a bridge. Your parts may already be listening, even if you can’t hear them back. The awkwardness usually fades as the practice starts to feel more natural—and the benefits of calm and cooperation become clearer.
3. Can I do a system meeting without direct communication?
Yes. Most systems don’t start out hearing clear replies. What matters is showing up consistently. Your brain and parts can register the effort even if you only get silence at first. Over time, these meetings strengthen the pathways that make two-way communication possible.
4. How long should a system meeting last?
It can be as short as a minute or as long as fifteen. Short is often better when you’re just beginning—you’re building the habit, not trying to solve everything in one sitting. Once it feels routine, you may naturally extend the time on days when there’s more to discuss.
5. What if I can’t hold the meeting at the same time every day?
That’s okay. Consistency helps, but flexibility is important too. Try to link your meeting to a “quiet pocket” in your day rather than a clock time. For example, “after dinner” or “before brushing teeth” works just as well as 9 a.m. Your system will gradually learn to expect it.